On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
