my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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