Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
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