i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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