im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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