I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
