I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
