"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I have tasted many bathrooms
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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