what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
