Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize