i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
