I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
