My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
