We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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