Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
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