Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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