So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Randomize
