So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Randomize
