There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Randomize
