It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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