That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Even the bartender felt bad for me
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize