What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
