I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Randomize