Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
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