butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
