All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Randomize
