i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
this boner is exhausting
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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