You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
