Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
