woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize