nut hugger
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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