Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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