Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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