Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
