Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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