This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
