Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize
