Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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