i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
