I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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