a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
