I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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