We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize