I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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