smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
