Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
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