she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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