Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize