is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
