Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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