the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize
