i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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